If I could go back and change one thing, I probably would have stayed in bed that Thursday night. I was all ready to go to sleep, but for some reason went online to check out things I hadn't looked at since the end of last year.
Some guy just sent a message asking me to text him. Hello, his number, and "txt me". And then I did. Some guy I wouldn't exactly be falling over myself to be with. I guess it was literally a case of 'anyone will do' that night. There are a couple of anyones I would have rather been with, but getting the cold shoulder from them leaves you feeling dejected and desperate.
Top Cat said you just have to chalk these things up to experience. I've not really got much choice. But I guess it cleared up how I feel about barebacking with strangers. It didn't add anything to the occasion that I really needed. Which isn't actually a new thought, it wasn't something I was particularly confused about, but this was confirmation. That's all I can chalk it up to, and it'll have to do.
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Finished up the 5 day PEP starter pack, onto the 30 days' worth I picked up from the hospital on Monday. As I was looking at the prescription, at all the boxes to tick relating to paying for it, I was dreading that I actually was going to have to pay something. I don't get my regular prescriptions from the GP for free, but what I pay is just over 1% (£7.40-ish) of what a month's supply of PEP would cost in full (£600). It was a massive relief when they just handed the bag over, no payment mentioned.
For the second time so far, yesterday I missed my evening dose by over 6 hours as I was asleep and didn't get up to take it at the right time. If I think I'm going to end up falling sleep before I'm supposed to take it, I might just do it a bit earlier. Trouble is I feel tired pretty much all the time, staying awake is easier said than done.
Still enjoying your updates, although I think we've both learned a lesson.
ReplyDeleteJust because someone doesn't say "no" doesn't mean he wants you to proceed.
That's the lesson I learned from you.
Just say "no" please if you don't want me to proceed. I'm not a mind reader!" Is the lesson you can learn from me.
Keep us posted. Your's is a very human real story, and very interesting, especially since I've never heard about PEP. I wonder if it's a common thing here in the US.
So what's the deal bud? You posted like a mad man for a few days then disappeared. By the way, your e-mail link in your profile doesn't work.
ReplyDeleteHit me back, my e-mail is on my profile. J.