As I've tried to think about what it is I want out of my life, sex life in particular, I keep running into the same conclusions: I have no fucking idea.
I don't really know what it is I want right now. One guy, or a string of guys. A serious relationship or a 'friends with benefits' type of deal. Whore myself around or take it steady for a while.
Or nothing at all, until I sort my own head out. Job and general living situation. Do some self-improvement. Rather than worrying about where I'm putting my dick.
Part of the problem is probably down to my not knowing what it's like having sex with the same guy consecutively for an extended period of time. Maybe that's great, or maybe it's lacking something. It's not like I've been having lots of sex with different guys lately, so I wouldn't exactly be missing anything. To be honest, after a string of disappointments I've all but taken myself off the market.
It's not that I don't want to have sex. I just don't want to have to deal with everything that comes along with even casual sex. The rest of life in general is enough of a pain to cope with.
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